It has been almost two weeks since I broke my foot, and I am still going to be in a boot a good while. Good news is that in about a week and a half, I can start trying to put full weight on my foot while in the boot. I expect that should give me some more freedom and mobility. Right now, even as I’m getting more accustomed to making my way around with crutches and making do in lots of areas of my life in that setup, it’s still a bit frustrating to not be able to do all the things I’m used to doing. I’m somewhat more accepting of my situation, but I am not settling in and making myself completely at home here. No, I look forward to freely being able to go about all my usual activities again … someday.
At first, I was panicky because of not getting any exercise and because I’m already far overweight and knowing I need to take better care of my body by replacing bad habits with better ones. (Emotional eating, yes, I’m talking about you.) And being frustrated and stressed and sitting still on a couch are certainly not great ways to break free of those emotional eating habits. Indeed, these conditions all just add up to gobble city.
My plan had been to just do my best to continue my regular exercise and try to watch and be aware of my eating for the next few weeks until my girls are finally back in school (the end of summer is the hardest, don’t you moms agree?). Then I could have a few hours every day to try to focus on mixing up my exercise routine and trying new things and work on those emotional eating habits. Good plan, I thought. But this past week, I’ve basically given up on that. Sure, I still hope to work on those things in a few weeks for all the same reasons, but in the meantime, I feel like now I’m just in survival/get-by mode, which is not as high a level as I’d hoped, which was just to exercise and be more aware. I’ve kind of kicked awareness to the curb and called in the ice-cream troops for comfort. And exercise? Well, yeah. Can’t do much of that right now.
But after talking to an old friend this morning, I thought, OK, it’s time to pull yourself together.
(Which immediately made me think of Gaston and LeFou in Disney’s “Beauty and the Beast” … “Gaston, you’ve got to pull yourself together!!” — Because in our family, every thought has a great corresponding movie quote. Just hang out with us for a couple of hours and you’ll see. Original thoughts? Low on the ground.)
OK. So I have a little desire in me to try to pull it together. I don’t feel super-motivated yet. It’s really just a tiny little ember that’s sparked and that I’m going to have to blow on very carefully and shield from big gusts of wind and rain. My desire to get it together and to tackle this stack of great books that can help me work through this emotional eating addiction I have is fragile, but I am going to try to make it stronger. I owe this to myself.
But I still think I’ll have an easier time of it in three weeks. Hasten, hasten, school days.